I do not remember a time that my relationship with food was ever normal.



Author in front of a wall of dots

I am a gay man in my 40’s. I live and work in Silicon Valley.

I have a history of binge eating disorder and bulimia nervosa. Eating disorder and food addiction have defined my relationship with food.

My goal is to normalize my relationship with food and find recovery from eating disorders. I manage my eating disorder and my relationship with food by eating according to a food plan. My abstinence is defined as following my food plan. My food plan has varied over time.

My journey of recovery from my eating disorder is ongoing. This site documents the information I gathered along my journey of recovery. This includes attempts at recovery that were not successful. This site is not intended to be a how-to guide or a self-help site. There are many of those, some of which I refer to here. Rather, this site documents my journey from despair to recovery from my eating disorder, sharing my failures and successes along the way.

I have had hundreds of “last binges.”
I do not know if this will be my last or not.
But I have newfound motivation to stop binge eating.


My Food Plan

Following a Mediterranean diet approach to healthy eating.


I define my abstinence as following my food plan. As long as I stay on that plan, I am abstaining from my compulsive eating behaviors & eating disorder.


My recovery is represented by sustained abstinence from my compulsive eating behavior and eating disorder, along with the ability to eat a wide and varied diet without distress or fear of loss of control over eating.




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